Just Breathe
Breath is life. It
sustains us, it nourishes us, and it is the thread of life running through all
of us—connecting us. Our breath can also be our greatest tool for
transformation. As a yoga instructor I'm constantly emphasizing focus on the
breath. At times I feel like a broken record, repeating instructions to
“connect with the breath” and “move with the breath”. And yet it is not
something I can stop talking about because it is so incredibly essential to our
practice, and beyond that, essential to our navigation of everyday life
challenges.
However, despite
knowing this, I wasn’t truly practicing it
in my own life. I paid attention to my breath periodically and intermittently,
either during mediation, or occasionally when I needed to focus. It wasn’t
until I bumped up against some major discomfort and anxiety that I began to really practice breathing as a tool for
transformation. I’m not even talking about specific breath
exercises here; I’m talking about simply breathing consciously and with intention. We
typically ignore the breath as we move about our days, letting it remain
shallow and unfocused. Remembering how vital conscious breathing is to my yoga
practice, I decided to take this practice off the mat and apply it to the struggles
I was having personally.
I was in a space
of frustration and confusion regarding my life’s direction (or lack thereof!).
I desperately wanted clarity but clarity wasn’t coming. I wasn’t receiving any
guidance, intuition, inspiration—nothing
was coming and I was beginning to develop anxiety. I was allowing my
frustration to consume me. I woke up thinking about how unfulfilled my life was
and I went to bed feeling like a failure. My well of creativity was dry—I just
couldn’t feel any creative inspiration or flow. At first I adopted the, “this
too shall pass” philosophy. Give it time and things will work out. I gave it
time. I gave it a lot of time. And
nothing changed. I continued to grow more frustrated and more disheartened.
I went through my
tool belt trying to find some answers: I meditated, I prayed, I journaled, I
set intentions, I put my manifestation skills to use. But still, clarity eluded
me. One afternoon I was having lunch at a local tea house, fretting that I’d
gone through my usual assortment of tools without success (what now?!). So I
turned to the only tool I had left —my breath. I decided to just breathe. I got
out of my head and simply breathed with the way things were—messy, scary, and
confusing. I breathed into being stuck and not knowing how to get unstuck. I
breathed into clearing the fear that holds me back. I breathed into the unknown
and the discomfort of having no direction. I breathed in the knowledge that I
am okay.
As the day went on
and my mind wanted to jump on its hamster wheel (creating more clutter and more
anxiety) I instead turned consciously to my breath. Breathing into not knowing
how to create the life I want. Breathing deeply into the unknown so I can make
space for it to be known. Breathing into ‘I don’t know how to move forward
right now’. My brain wasn’t used to this. It’s used to avoiding discomfort, not
breathing into it! Through this practice I could relax. My nervous system could
relax. Through each breath I could release fear and frustration and make space
for clarity. With each breath I was reminding myself to stay with the present
moment with acceptance that the present moment isn’t always comfortable. I knew
that by simply breathing—consciously, fully, deeply—I was making space for the
next step to emerge. And it was enough. For that moment, this was my forward movement.
I began to embrace
this practice more fully as time went on and through various circumstances. The
funny thing is, I began this practice fully believing that by working with the
breath I would get instant gratification; that if I just breathed and made
space, solutions would miraculously appear. They didn’t. At least not in the
way I was expecting. Consciously breathing with what is didn’t change the
circumstances, but it stabilized me as circumstances unfolded. This kept me out
of resistance and in life’s flow, thereby allowing life to unfold more fluidly
and allowing me to move through stuck spaces more quickly and with more ease
and grace. While the mental hamster wheel perpetuates our experience of anxiety
or frustration, turning to the breath can move us through the tough spots more gracefully.
We try to understand everything, to figure everything out. But sometimes the
most powerful thing we can do is simply breathe with what is—to not try to think and puzzle it out but to breathe into
the unknown and surrender. I have discovered that here, in this space of
surrender (for me, accessed by the breath) life is sweet. I worry less, I trust
more, and I feel more confident in navigating the challenges that come up. I
sleep better, not carrying problems to bed to worry over. I know that despite
temporary hardships I can find a place of surrender and allow things to unfold
while not losing sight of the good stuff. The breath allowed me to do this. The
breath brings me back to center and when I’m centered I remember—I remember
that life is a beautiful chaotic dance, sometimes euphoric and sometimes
devastating. I remember that I am okay. I remember that I have many blessings
to be thankful for. And I remember to just
breathe.
With Love,
Heather
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